Thursday, 3 January 2013

The Great Hunt

I've returned from my winter holiday break and the first night back in my old bed I had a very strange dream.

Very strange indeed.

It began as many wonderful dreams do, in a forest. It was a really great forest, with a soft mossy floor and delicate ferns uncurling in the green light. Many leafy trees stretched high above and their trunks were thick with lichen. I walked along barefoot, listening to the sounds.

There was a squirrel in a large oak tree, tapping a nut on the branch. He stopped his task to look at me inquisitively before dashing out of sight.

I walked on, and became aware that I was searching for something. I wore a worn tunic of tanned hides and it hung below my knees. In my hand was a curved bow, lovingly crafted from birch wood. Slung carefree over my shoulder I carried a small quiver and I could hear the quiet jostle of the arrows inside as I stepped.


In the quiet forest I walked, careful not to make a sound. I turned quickly when I heard the sound of a twig snapping. A short distance away, a young deer stood in the shadows. It looked me in the eye for a moment, and then exploded into action.

Forgetting my need for silence, I burst into a run after the beast. It darted between the trees like an old pro, trying to lose me.

I persisted and at the top of the hill, as it jumped over a low concrete wall, I loosed an arrow. It flew true! The beast stumbled into the trench beyond the wall and disappeared from sight. I followed swiftly, and leaned over the wall.

This wall was roughly three feet high from my side, but I could now see it cut deeper into the hill than I had thought.This wall was 6 feet deep into the ground and beyond it was a curvaceous grassland that resembled a golf course. The wall ran in a straight line to the east and west, and followed the contours of the hillocks so that I could see no end of it. Four feet from the wall ran a parallel chain-link fence, set into a low wall of concrete.

I planted my hands onto the wall and vaulted over. I landed with a thud on the short grass, but as I knelt there I could see no sign of the deer. I walked along the chain-link fence until I came to a door. It was unlocked, and I let myself in. I could hear a soft rustle, and the moans of the dying deer.

I followed the sound to find the deer lying behind a thatch of low bushes, but as I drew nearer I looked on in dismay.

I had not shot a young buck in the forest, it was Him! The King of the Forest. The Great Beast of Breasts. He who ran swift as the wind and light as a feather. He now lay at my feet, with barely enough strength to lift His huge head of antlers. I fell to my knees and grasped the arrow protruding from His chest with both hands. I yanked it abruptly and pressed my hand to His gaping wound. I reached into my tunic with the other hand for the small satchel that hung around my neck from a leather cord. I tore it open with my teeth and the contents spewed onto His velvety fur. I scooped a handful of the white beads towards the wound and pressed them into the fur matted with blood. I pressed down with both hands and said the Ancient Words.

The beads of course, are not beads at all, but the unhatched eggs of the Delkin Larvae. Beneath the warmth of my hands and the moisture of His blood, they awoke to their Ancient rite. The hatched and burrowed into the King's wounds. He wailed with paint and his eyes rolled in their sockets as the Larvae dug into his flesh. I slowly stood up and stepped away as His fur began to ripple like water in a pond. The Larvae have been told to have miraculous healing properties, but at the price of great pain.

At that moment, we heard a loud crack and the sound of approaching men. Heavy boots plodded on the spongy ground. He raised himself to his knees, then to His full height. The Larvae still bubbled and boiled below his skin, but despite the pain He dashed out of sight. I raced back to the door in the fence and eased myself over the high wall. I collapsed on the other side, panting.

When I caught my breath, I felt the queer sense someone was watching me. I raised myself up, notched an arrow, and looked about. What I saw made me nearly lose me grip.

Standing in the woods was a great white moose. From his rack of antlers there flowed ripped tatters of what looked like white cloth, and it trailed behind him like a ghost. He turned away, took a few steps, and looked back. I got shakily to my feet, and followed slowly behind him. He walked on at a steady pace, weaving a path through the trees but often looking back to see me following. Some of the white fabric would catch on a branch or bush, but it would melt in my hand like snow when I tried to collect it.

I followed him deep into the forest as the sun sank low in the sky. I had no idea why, but I could feel this was of great importance. The forest felt sickly and the trees were dark and bare. We came to a clearing in this forbidden wood, and this great moose vanished altogether. It seemed that the clearing had once been a human settlement, and the square skeletal foundation of a large stone house could still be seen. In the centre of the square ring was a raised stone platform, much like an altar. Lodged in the altar, I saw my ill fated arrow that I had loosed earlier today (it had been lost in the shuffle). It now stood straight in the air, the head buried deep in the stone. I could see it oozed a black slime from the wound, which had dripped from the altar and poisoned the surrounding plants.

Already the soil closest to the altar had turned to sand; the grasses had dried up and blown away. Some larger vines persisted, but were black with the poison. This was my doing.


I stumbled towards the altar. I could hear a low dreadful moan and was surprised to find it was coming from my own throat. I began yanking the dead plants from their sandy deathbeds. I finally approached the altar and found it was covered in the black dead vines. I reached into my belt and pulled out my short knife. I pulled and slashed and tore until my hands bled, and collapsed in tears when the altar was bare.

I crawled on my hands and knees up to the altar. My hands that were coated in sticky black tar and blood were now coated in sand. I reached up and grasped the arrow, but found I had no strength left to pull it. I let myself fall onto the altar and cried into the crook of my arm.

Just as the last rays of sun dissolved into darkness and it seemed that all hope was lost, I felt a presence.He had returned to me! He looked down upon me sternly, and I tearfully returned his gaze. He finally gave me the strength I needed to continue. I stood and pulled on the arrow with both hands, ignoring the pain and holding tight despite the slippery blood. I pulled with all of my might until the arrow came free and I fell backward onto the earth that was already beginning to heal. I looked around for the King, but he was nowhere to be found.

Monday, 19 November 2012

Passion vs. Practicality

If someone were to ask me, what do you love doing?
   I would probably answer, "Art and science."

Well those aren't things to DO, they are subjects. What do you love doing?
  "Right now, I love wood burning. It's the art of using wood, and drawing on it with a really hot pen. I also enjoy teaching science at the high school level."

So what do you want to do with the rest of your life? 
   "I want to have a good job."
Doing what?
    "Something I enjoy. Teaching seems like the most practical."


But in all honesty, I really like art. I forgot how much I liked it while I slogged through a four year degree in Science. At one point during high school I remember sitting myself down to course selection, and scrapping my crafts class for a more practical physics class. Do I regret that? Not really.

Because it's not practical.

There are few jobs available to the artist. Who, in an economic downfall, wants to pay one hundred dollars for something to simply decorate the wall? In the world where pop art and prints are available at Dollarstores and Walmarts all over the country, and photos are merely a click away online, why do you need an artist?

I didn't want to go to school for it, I didn't want to ruin my passion with lectures, theory, art history, and the bureaucracy of post secondary education. Plus, it's not practical. Spend 4 years in an arts major just to end up with maybe a job? I wonder what percentage of art school graduates actually end up with a studio somewhere with rich patrons casually strolling through sipping wine?

Art is my sanctuary from my work. I can't really make it into a business that I need to produce something to put food on my table because then it would become work! I wonder if I would start writing papers and reading essays to distract me from my art then?

Doubt it.

Now you've read my rant, check out my tumblr. 

You can also follow me on twitter if you want updates whenever I post a new pic to the tumblr.



Monday, 17 September 2012

To Russia, with love


I recently realized... there's someone in Russia that has visited my blog.
Actually, hits from Russia make up 3.4% of my overall page view history.

I have to wonder if it's an accident, but 96 page views can't just be an accident, right?
So to my Russian viewers, I say
Добро пожаловать!  как ты меня нашел??          

I honestly don't know much about Russia aside from the matryoshka dolls, the beautiful buildings in Moscow, and the stereotypical alcoholic beverage of choice. 

I'd like to hear back from my readers, but perhaps you don't have an account and can't leave comments. But by now, everyone has Facebook, right?

Click here to like the Facebook page if you haven't already!

Leave comments, criticism, or suggestions!

Unsurprisingly the majority of views comes from Canada and the US. Actually most of these views are likely just from my close friends. But thank you to everyone who does check my blog, it'll never be as famous as Hyperbole and a Half, but it's still fun to write!


Thanks!

Friday, 7 September 2012

Graffiti, Turtles, and Good Advice

Continuing my tales of exploring London... to read the first edition of this, click here.

I left the farmhouse and continued bicycling around the city. I came across an abandoned building with an open door swaying in the breeze. The glass had been smashed out and lay on the stoop in a pile of geometric fragments. 

I went inside to see what I could find. It was a roughly round building with a cone shaped roof. A small rectangular back room extended to the west side, but it was dark and smelled of decay so I dared not to tread too deep. In the tiny room that served as a bathroom, the only remaining feature was an oval mirror. It smiled back at me as I took it off the hook it hung on. The abandoned office sported a collapsing ceiling and a mouldering armchair.
I thought this might be the napping place of a passing-through wanderer, so I left him a cheery greeting.
One eye of the smiling face had dripped, and it seemed to me that it might be crying as well.
In the main room, I could see that someone had read the Dark Tower by Stephen King. This is a series of very long novels and a personal favorite. Written in what appeared to be lipstick, or nail polish was "Oh discordia" and a common tagline found in the book, "Bangoskank was here".



I'm glad I'm not the only one who appreciates those books.











I rummaged around a while longer. I had determined it had been a gardening shop. A sticker that held together some shards of broken glass from the window proclaimed that they had been a member of some Ontario landscaping association. I also found a red hexagonal sticker clinging to it's own glass. It proclaimed, "STOP! Contents marked for quick identification by polica break, enter and theft. Maximum penalty life imprisionment"

I find it humorous that I found this while I was exiting the building, and suddenly felt like I should leave.

Back on the road, I had to swerve suddenly to avoid a carcass of an unfortunate roadkill victim. And then another. And another! I found nine dead painted turtles, there they are standing in a row. Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head. (Okay maybe not that big).
They all lay at the edge of the busy roadway in various states of decomposition. Now I will have it stated, that this species of turtle has been designated as a "Specially Protected Reptile" under the Ontario Fish and Wildlife Conservation Act which offers protection to individuals but not their habitat.

As if to illustrate this, I turned around to see where these poor unfortunate souls had come from, and a large sign proclaimed "PRIME LAND FOR DEVELOPMENT". I didn't know whether to throw up, or cry.
London seems to be a city that is growing up and over a rich natural land. I said once to a friend that my first impression is London is a mutant hybrid of city, suburbia, countryside, and landfill (sorry to say it, but there is a lot of litter).

As if to prove my point,while I climbed a small mountain of grey earth behind a shopping plaza, I found a discarded backpack with it's contents strewn about and caked with dry mud. It looked like the remains some thief had left behind after rummaging out all of the "good stuff". The one item that caught my eye was a small stone square with a leather cord. A piece of white paper listed, what seemed to me as the 10 commandments. However, upon closer inspection, I think they are really just pieces of good advice. What I could make out is:
6.
7. ........................................ on Sundays.
8. You shall respect your peers their suggestions
9. You shall not cheat on your spouse
10. You shall respect the environment that you live




Last but not least, a throwback to my Sweeny Todd reference... I passed by an interesting barber shop. Even If I had a beard to shave, I don't think I would be a patron there.
 

Saturday, 1 September 2012

There's no place like London

 I have sailed the world,
beheld its wonders
from the Dardanelles,
to the mountains of Peru,
But there's no place like London!
 No, there's no place like London...

For those of you who enjoy musicals, those are the lines from the first song in the movie Sweeny Todd. The song continues to really bash the city of London, England.

Personally I have recently been stationed to London, Ontario. It has been an interesting first week! I have done some exploring, bicycling around the city and looking for...well... something to find. My favourite things to find are the forgotten places. I suppose that fits well with the title of my blog.

While traveling along a major road, I noticed a dirt road that led to this lovely old bridge that spanned over the railroad tracks.
Note: if I had taken this photo from a higher vantage you would be able to see a multitude of siamese-twin roofs that are the hallmark of suburbia
Ignoring the signs warning about the dangers of crossing, I walked across the ancient bridge and saw the dirt road led to an old house that had been boarded up. Across the driveway was the remains of a barn that had been burned to the ground. Only one wall remained standing and behind this was a cacophony of old hay and blackened wooden struts. This wall was white, and adorned with sharpie quotations left by some rogue poet.
 
I climbed down into the jumble of burnt lumber and litter and looked around.

Perhaps most people would see trash, but I always find treasure. On a lid from a large metal drum I noticed a burned book. Upon closer inspection, I found it was Holy Bible.
At random, I chose one page and pocketed it. I read it later, when I was less creeped out, and some interesting quotes jumped out at me. I am not a religious person, but I you will never hear me say that there is no benefit to theology.

        24 Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go:
        25 Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul. 
       12 Apply thine heart unto instruction, and thine ears to the words of knowledge.

However, I will draw the line when it comes to quotes like this following one, it just gives me the creeps.
        17 Let not thine heart envy sinners:but be thou in the fear of the LORD all the day long.

(When I Googled these quotes I found that they come from the King James version,
and that these are proverbs, if you care to know.)

I also found some smashed crystal-ware, and I photographed it because I loved the contrast of fine crafted beauty smashed against the rocks.

My favourite item to be found near this husk of a barn was a very rusted treasure chest. Or a trunk? Whichever you want to call it, depending on your imagination. At the bottom of the chest was a dark blue crushed velvet dress, thrown in a heap of disarray.



It had a fine fake silver clasp below the breasts and the neckline was adorned with silver beadwork, which was haphazard now and tearing apart. It looked more like moth-eaten, cheap costume apparel than a lady's dress.  I dropped it back to it's hiding place when a small spider crept onto my hand. (Bleck!)

Still shaking my hand, I left the property and bicycled back over the bridge. As I went over it, a train with many cars and tankers sped below me. Once they had passed, I couldn't resist the temptation to go check out the tracks, and also to snap a cliche photo of myself. 

More to come! I have some more photos and I plan to continue exploring
London's secret places in hiding over the next few months. Cheerio!

Saturday, 25 August 2012

Shameless Self Promotion



I haven't posted in a long time!

I've been busy making things in real life instead of online. You can check out my projects at my
tumblr page.




 
One of my projects has been working with Travis Cranmer. You can check out his website at earthdesign.ca


My addition to his awesome birdhouses has been wood burning! I have finished ~15 houses, each with a unique design AND the latin name of the organism on the bottom. I have only posted photos of the plants so far, but will post pictures of the bird designs that I have recently done soon.


If you are really interested in purchasing such a work of art (shameless self promotion), contact Travis through his website. We can likely work in a custom design of your favourite native Canadian plant or animal.

I'm moving tomorrow, but once I get settled in my new place I will likely be able to write again, and more regularly. Wish me luck! I will be starting teacher's college in a few weeks!



Friday, 22 June 2012

The Lover's Crucifixion


He stood only feet from her.
She would not or could not look his way.
Fine fabrics with ornate gold trim embraced her,
Delicate chains of gold and silver glittered against her skin.
He tried his best to catch her eye, feeling like a foolish cock romancing a peacock.
As she slowly turned toward him, his heart soared to the sky.
Her steps were measured as she walked his way.
He could barely contain his racing heart.
After all of this time, this is IT.
She paused momentarily a few feet away.
He took a deep breath, and felt like he was under water.
He would drown in this moment if she did not take a few more steps into his open arms.
Her eyelids fluttered, and gracefully lifted a dainty hand
To her red full lips. His heart might break.
Will she will call the to guards?
The fat lazy men employed to carry spears.
They had not seen him slip through the servant's door but
Would they see this dangerously public display of affection for their employer's daughter?
He had been holding his arms open to embrace her for hours.
He recalled a tale of crucifixion and thought,
This is how the man Jesus died.
No. He had only been frozen a few seconds.
She parted her lips slightly, moving them to form a silent word.
Hidden from her father by her raised hand, gloved in a pale pink fabric that could be silk.
His arms dropped limply so his sides, and she turned to the crowd.
His eyes darted around the room, searching.
What he needed now was a clock.
Embarrassed by his foolishness, he fidgeted. 
Of course she couldn't run to him, and expose their  love to Them.
She wouldn't ruin the elaborate Debutante Ball her father held in her honor. Not until "Midnight"




Thursday, 29 March 2012

Animated!


Hope you enjoyed my gifs, I'm loking at making a bit of a cartoon at some point!

Saturday, 24 March 2012

Something Once Forgotten- Page 4

To my fellow students:
I'm so sorry I get the munchies in class.

Tuesday, 6 March 2012

Potential

po·ten·tial
adj.
1. Capable of being but not yet in existence; latent: a potential problem.
2. Having possibility, capability, or power.
n.
1. The inherent ability or capacity for growth, development, or coming into being.
2. Something possessing the capacity for growth or development.
3. Physics The work required to move a unit of positive charge, a magnetic pole, or an amount of mass from a reference point to a designated point in a static electric, magnetic, or gravitational field; energy potential .
Let's first talk about energy potential. This is the physicist in me speaking. Energy potential can be increased by simply walking up a flight of stairs. The higher you get, the more you increase your gravitational potential. This means, if you happen to fall down the stairs (which happens to me quite often) you will generate more energy if you fall from the top step than if you trip and fall at ground level.
Eat a bag of chips to increase your internal chemical potential. Eat many bags of chips to further increase your gravitational potential (If you were really keen you could eat chips while walking up stairs, but the exercise may negate the weight gain so walk nice and slow).
You could rub a balloon on your head or eat the magnets off your fridge to increase your electric potential energy (Please note, the latter is not advised).
Economic potential is another category we could talk about. Statistically the income of your parents has a linear relationship with your economic potential. I'm not going to tell you not to strive to be the next CEO of Coca~Cola if you grew up in a trailer park, but it sure helps if you're from the Hamptons.
You could increase your economic potential through education. However, it seems that everyone has jumped onto the "Bachelor" ship and the significance of a four year degree is sinking.
                              
I'd like to note that the graph above isn't based on any data, just my personal estimation. And the "college" degree I'm referring to is <4 years. AND this could be wrong if you get into a trade that is in high demand. In addition, the numbers do not apply if you return to your former job flipping burgers directly after you graduate.
The final potential I'd like you to consider is the potential to do good. It's harder to pin down an exact trend to determine a person's potential to go good.
Logically you would think that the potential to do good increases with your annual net profit. However, this is not always true. There are some people like Angelina Jolie that will go out and adopt a baseball team of undreprivileged ethic children. Some contributions are less visual. People like Bill Gates and Donald Trump will start a charity, or donate millions to others.
Personally I can't expect to do either. Firstly I can't handle young children. Secondly I'm not a billionaire. But maybe we could measure this potential as time. How many years have you worked in a soup kitchen, or how many times have you held a door open? Maybe it's a proportion. How much you give versus how much you have.  I met a man that sold everything, bought an old school bus, and toured USA feeding homeless people. I've also met people that have never said "Gesundheit" to a stranger.
So my dear reader, what is your potential?

I'd also like to wish my father good luck as he ventures to Thailand in hopes to do some good. Soon he will be at Isara, a foundation in Thailand working to improve education, the environment, and generally do good things. Click the link to read more. 
 Here is Josh, the Reader of the Month for February! Thanks for always being yourself.

Saturday, 3 March 2012

Something Once Forgotten-The Manga Page 3

The third and final page of this story.
Side note: This actually happened to me, and after that I didn't see this guy for almost 2 months!

Thursday, 2 February 2012

First World Problems

"First World Problems" is a meme that caught my eye and made me think a little. There are pictures usually depicting a caucasian male or female crying and have text on them such as "McDonald's doesn't deliver" or "I left the remote on the other side of the room".

 For instance:

So this spurred me to think of problems I have in my daily life that really wouldn't be a problem if I wasn't so privledged.


Printing double sided is hard- I always try to print on both sides of the paper to save the environment, but every time I use a printer I spend a few minutes trying to think "this is the front of the paper... so this will have to go face-down..." ect. And almost 50% of the time I still muck it up and have to use more paper than I had originally had anticipated. Damn.

Toilet paper is rolled wrong direction- Yep. It's the silliest pet peeve but I always have to fix it whenever I see this.  (Even if it's not my house) 
I read once that you typically use less paper when it's rolled the correct way, and this makes sense to me. To tear it with one hand you generally have to tear it one square further when it's rolled the incorrect way. If you want to challenge me on this, I've prepared a lengthy debate. 

I missed the bus- Yeah this one really sucks. But honestly, the fact that I have good sturdy shoes on my feet and a solid diet should mean that I can withstand a much longer walk than a less equiped human. I guess I'm just a wimp. 

The waiting room at the clinic takes too long. - Wait. Damn. Did I just complain about my free health care? Sorry about that. 

My internet is too slow- The average cell phone has more computing power than the room-sized computers of the 1960's. And I'm complaining that my tiny (by comparison) laptop can't load a youtube video? Man.Perspective is a kick in the pants. 

My class is boring- Sometimes it's really hard to pay attention in class because of the nasaly voice of the professor, the classroom being too warm, or the class being scheduled too late/early in the day. I snap back to reality when I realize how lucky I am to even have a seat in that class. Skipping classes is totally out of the question. 
 

Addendum:
Brian qualified as the Reader of the Month for January! Thanks for getting me hooked on reddit! -_-

Thursday, 26 January 2012

Search Terms

I checked out recent search terms that had my blog pop up.

"you have any ideas for future" was one of them . It's odd because I typed the same thing into Google and wouldn't find it, even within the first 40 pages or so.

Other intresting terms included:

    skyrim argonian ale (4x)
    brown haired breton woman-skyrim (1x)
    preservatives in Kraft Dinner (2x)
    bathroom was located (3x)

So here's a quick post that will actually make those search terms more legitimate.


On day I was sitting alone at the pub and I thought to myself, "Do you have any ideas for future?" I hadn't really put thought much into it before so I pensively sipped my Skyrim Argonian ale, a rare import. I looked to my left and saw a  brown haired Breton woman slumped over the bar. She mumbled something into the lacquered wood. I reached over and gently turned her head to face me.

I leaned in and asked her,"What did you say?"

Her thickly lashed eyes opened slowly. She wore too much makeup.

"There's too many preservatives in Kraft Dinner" she drunkenly slurred. 
Suddenly she shot out of her seat, hand over her mouth and eyes wide open. I pointed her to where the bathroom was located, finished my ale and walked out of the pub.

Friday, 20 January 2012

SOF-The Manga! Page 1

I'm trying something new today... I've been reading some manga and it inspired me. Let me know what you think! More pages to come asap

Thursday, 19 January 2012

Socially Networked

So I made a "tumblr". I had to check three times to tell if I was spelling it correctly.
Basically I threw up some art (drawings, sketches and paintings) that have been stored on my computer and are now free for the viewing public. I figure I might as well put out as much spam into the internet void as I can before the SOPA or ACTA or whatever copyright legislation closes down the internet.

Anyways if you want to follow me on tumblr you can find the site at: http://somethingonceforgotten.tumblr.com/
(I'm real creative eh?)
 
Also it appears that my twitter has been twatting all of my posts to tumblr, so if you haven't already you can follow me on twitter here for posts about the tumblr and the blog.

Friends Forever!
AND for those of you who aren't in the loop with twitter or tumblr there's the good old Facebook page here.

Gosh I'm so into these social networking sites... maybe now I can make some real friends! Not that my old friends aren't great, they just get a little...stuffy.

Hah. Hah. Pardon the pun.

BAM. Meet Reader of the Month for December, Jesse the Tortoise Jockey.
Thanks for tweeting me today!