Showing posts with label random. Show all posts
Showing posts with label random. Show all posts

Thursday, 3 January 2013

The Great Hunt

I've returned from my winter holiday break and the first night back in my old bed I had a very strange dream.

Very strange indeed.

It began as many wonderful dreams do, in a forest. It was a really great forest, with a soft mossy floor and delicate ferns uncurling in the green light. Many leafy trees stretched high above and their trunks were thick with lichen. I walked along barefoot, listening to the sounds.

There was a squirrel in a large oak tree, tapping a nut on the branch. He stopped his task to look at me inquisitively before dashing out of sight.

I walked on, and became aware that I was searching for something. I wore a worn tunic of tanned hides and it hung below my knees. In my hand was a curved bow, lovingly crafted from birch wood. Slung carefree over my shoulder I carried a small quiver and I could hear the quiet jostle of the arrows inside as I stepped.


In the quiet forest I walked, careful not to make a sound. I turned quickly when I heard the sound of a twig snapping. A short distance away, a young deer stood in the shadows. It looked me in the eye for a moment, and then exploded into action.

Forgetting my need for silence, I burst into a run after the beast. It darted between the trees like an old pro, trying to lose me.

I persisted and at the top of the hill, as it jumped over a low concrete wall, I loosed an arrow. It flew true! The beast stumbled into the trench beyond the wall and disappeared from sight. I followed swiftly, and leaned over the wall.

This wall was roughly three feet high from my side, but I could now see it cut deeper into the hill than I had thought.This wall was 6 feet deep into the ground and beyond it was a curvaceous grassland that resembled a golf course. The wall ran in a straight line to the east and west, and followed the contours of the hillocks so that I could see no end of it. Four feet from the wall ran a parallel chain-link fence, set into a low wall of concrete.

I planted my hands onto the wall and vaulted over. I landed with a thud on the short grass, but as I knelt there I could see no sign of the deer. I walked along the chain-link fence until I came to a door. It was unlocked, and I let myself in. I could hear a soft rustle, and the moans of the dying deer.

I followed the sound to find the deer lying behind a thatch of low bushes, but as I drew nearer I looked on in dismay.

I had not shot a young buck in the forest, it was Him! The King of the Forest. The Great Beast of Breasts. He who ran swift as the wind and light as a feather. He now lay at my feet, with barely enough strength to lift His huge head of antlers. I fell to my knees and grasped the arrow protruding from His chest with both hands. I yanked it abruptly and pressed my hand to His gaping wound. I reached into my tunic with the other hand for the small satchel that hung around my neck from a leather cord. I tore it open with my teeth and the contents spewed onto His velvety fur. I scooped a handful of the white beads towards the wound and pressed them into the fur matted with blood. I pressed down with both hands and said the Ancient Words.

The beads of course, are not beads at all, but the unhatched eggs of the Delkin Larvae. Beneath the warmth of my hands and the moisture of His blood, they awoke to their Ancient rite. The hatched and burrowed into the King's wounds. He wailed with paint and his eyes rolled in their sockets as the Larvae dug into his flesh. I slowly stood up and stepped away as His fur began to ripple like water in a pond. The Larvae have been told to have miraculous healing properties, but at the price of great pain.

At that moment, we heard a loud crack and the sound of approaching men. Heavy boots plodded on the spongy ground. He raised himself to his knees, then to His full height. The Larvae still bubbled and boiled below his skin, but despite the pain He dashed out of sight. I raced back to the door in the fence and eased myself over the high wall. I collapsed on the other side, panting.

When I caught my breath, I felt the queer sense someone was watching me. I raised myself up, notched an arrow, and looked about. What I saw made me nearly lose me grip.

Standing in the woods was a great white moose. From his rack of antlers there flowed ripped tatters of what looked like white cloth, and it trailed behind him like a ghost. He turned away, took a few steps, and looked back. I got shakily to my feet, and followed slowly behind him. He walked on at a steady pace, weaving a path through the trees but often looking back to see me following. Some of the white fabric would catch on a branch or bush, but it would melt in my hand like snow when I tried to collect it.

I followed him deep into the forest as the sun sank low in the sky. I had no idea why, but I could feel this was of great importance. The forest felt sickly and the trees were dark and bare. We came to a clearing in this forbidden wood, and this great moose vanished altogether. It seemed that the clearing had once been a human settlement, and the square skeletal foundation of a large stone house could still be seen. In the centre of the square ring was a raised stone platform, much like an altar. Lodged in the altar, I saw my ill fated arrow that I had loosed earlier today (it had been lost in the shuffle). It now stood straight in the air, the head buried deep in the stone. I could see it oozed a black slime from the wound, which had dripped from the altar and poisoned the surrounding plants.

Already the soil closest to the altar had turned to sand; the grasses had dried up and blown away. Some larger vines persisted, but were black with the poison. This was my doing.


I stumbled towards the altar. I could hear a low dreadful moan and was surprised to find it was coming from my own throat. I began yanking the dead plants from their sandy deathbeds. I finally approached the altar and found it was covered in the black dead vines. I reached into my belt and pulled out my short knife. I pulled and slashed and tore until my hands bled, and collapsed in tears when the altar was bare.

I crawled on my hands and knees up to the altar. My hands that were coated in sticky black tar and blood were now coated in sand. I reached up and grasped the arrow, but found I had no strength left to pull it. I let myself fall onto the altar and cried into the crook of my arm.

Just as the last rays of sun dissolved into darkness and it seemed that all hope was lost, I felt a presence.He had returned to me! He looked down upon me sternly, and I tearfully returned his gaze. He finally gave me the strength I needed to continue. I stood and pulled on the arrow with both hands, ignoring the pain and holding tight despite the slippery blood. I pulled with all of my might until the arrow came free and I fell backward onto the earth that was already beginning to heal. I looked around for the King, but he was nowhere to be found.

Thursday, 26 January 2012

Search Terms

I checked out recent search terms that had my blog pop up.

"you have any ideas for future" was one of them . It's odd because I typed the same thing into Google and wouldn't find it, even within the first 40 pages or so.

Other intresting terms included:

    skyrim argonian ale (4x)
    brown haired breton woman-skyrim (1x)
    preservatives in Kraft Dinner (2x)
    bathroom was located (3x)

So here's a quick post that will actually make those search terms more legitimate.


On day I was sitting alone at the pub and I thought to myself, "Do you have any ideas for future?" I hadn't really put thought much into it before so I pensively sipped my Skyrim Argonian ale, a rare import. I looked to my left and saw a  brown haired Breton woman slumped over the bar. She mumbled something into the lacquered wood. I reached over and gently turned her head to face me.

I leaned in and asked her,"What did you say?"

Her thickly lashed eyes opened slowly. She wore too much makeup.

"There's too many preservatives in Kraft Dinner" she drunkenly slurred. 
Suddenly she shot out of her seat, hand over her mouth and eyes wide open. I pointed her to where the bathroom was located, finished my ale and walked out of the pub.

Friday, 27 May 2011

Popularity

I get really excited every day to check how many hits my blog has.

My favourite thing to check is this graph. I especially like seeing it peak when I posted something new, which tells me that people are here, (hopefully reading) due to my constant advertising and word-of-mouth. I may be addicted to this little graph.

Also I am super happy to announce that I am finally over the 1000 mark!

Right now I'm probably ankle deep in a Nicaraguan field, thinking about how many hits I've gotten in my absence. I'm guessing by the time I get back it will be roughly 1500, so thanks for visiting and helping me get up there.

I don't think I will ever have enough popularity to actually profit from this blog. There is a way I can put adds on the page, but I only get paid if people actually click them. And really, If you guys are anything like me, it would be a waste of time.

I look up to Allie, author of Hyperbole and a Half. She writes blogs with funny pictures, so you might think I'm copying her.


Okay I might be slightly copying her, but it really merges two things I enjoy so....

So anyways I have decided that my measurement of popularity is having fans that I don't personally know. Therefore, I picked this week's Reader of the Week to be someone entirely new. (See? Equal opportunities!)




The Reader of the Week is Olivia. She is one of the first people to LIKE us on Facebook. Hope you can forgive me for borrowing you profile picture, but hope you will spread the word about my humble blog! :)


Look forward to a brand NEW blog NEXT Friday about my awesome travels!

And please forgive the lack of pictures in this one, I wrote it while packing.